Back when I was in college at Western Kentucky University from approximately 2003-2007, I was what you would call a “broke-ass bitch.” I also had a large group of friends I will call my “broke-ass bitch” friends.

I often ask myself – and them – why we were so broke. All of us had jobs. Most of us were servers or bartenders. We all worked a lot.

So what were we spending all of our money on? Odd that you ask. I had to think hard about this.

Here is a short list:

1. Tanning at the $1 Wash and Tan.… CONTINUE READING

Women

Last week, I was talking to a man who asked me if I thought women could have it all. You know, the whole shebang. The real deal. The DREAM. A beautiful family, a great career, a house with a white picket fence and a dog that doesn’t jump on every person that enters the house. A great social life, a physically fit body with flawless makeup and a humanitarian.

I came to the quick conclusion that no, women cannot have it all.

We can make it look that way on social media, but we all know that’s not true.

He seemed very surprised at this answer coming from me.… CONTINUE READING

Struggling is waking up every morning to your alarm clock, the sound of a crying baby, hours before you expect it.

Struggling is thinking about all the things you need to accomplish that day and feeling your chest tighten a little.

Struggling is trying to keep it together, so they don’t fall apart.

Struggling is making it down the stairs before the kids roll out of bed just to realize you forgot to make that last minute trip to the grocery for milk last night.

Struggling is crying in the bathroom while the shower runs, clutching a cup of coffee, and watching tiny little fingers reach under the door.… CONTINUE READING

Rain

Today, I felt the need to tell this story of true and honest mom failure. It was a literal hot mess and I don’t know why I ever attempt to do anything with grace and tact.

So here’s the deal. Why is taking a baby somewhere in the rain a total f-ing shit show? As in, I would rather just stay home but unfortunately not wanting to get out in the rain is not an acceptable excuse to skip your child’s doctor’s appointment.

Sidebar: Yesterday Henry told me and my husband he never wanted to go anywhere again. When we asked why, he simply said, “November”.… CONTINUE READING

Please stop judging me for leaving the office at exactly 5 pm, but my kids are waiting to be picked up from the sitter.

I know I’m missing this meeting, but my kid’s preschool graduation is more important.

I know I was late today, but I can’t drop the baby off at daycare until 7:45 am.

I know that I seem distracted, because I am distracted. I have a sick toddler and I am waiting to find out when I can get him into the pediatrician.

I don’t want to look exhausted when I show up to the office, but I have been awake since 4:30 am with an inconsolable kid.… CONTINUE READING

A few days before Christmas, I decided that I needed a break. I was tired, agitated, stressed and couldn’t stop thinking about everything I needed to do to prepare for the upcoming holiday.

I decided to do a social media blackout. I took the social media apps off my phone and dove into ALL the things that needed to be done. Not surprisingly, I finished them in a record amount of time.

As a blogger, I spend a lot of time on social media. That is simply part of my brand. But part of the reason I started my blog is because social media puts such crazy unrealistic expectations into our lives.… CONTINUE READING

That Moment

That moment when you are looking at pictures and realize that your baby boys aren’t babies anymore.

That moment that a tiny little piece of your heart feels like it is literally breaking into pieces because you might never get to rock them to sleep again.

That moment, that gut-wrenching moment, that your two-year old calls you Mommy for the first time instead of Mama.

That moment when your five-year old gets his first big boy haircut and you watch his little curls fall to the floor and try not to cry.

That moment when they give you the best hug and you try so hard not to let go because you don’t know when you might get another one.… CONTINUE READING

Boy Mom

Life as a boy mom is having that sweet baby boy placed in your arms for the first time and immediately falling in love, but also secretly feeling guilty because you think he kind of looks like a potato.

Life as a boy mom is soccer balls and baseballs, but also having to remind them to keep THEIR HANDS OUT OF THEIR PANTS AND OFF THEIR ACTUAL BALLS!

Life as a boy mom is literally chasing a naked baby around the house while sweating and cussing because he doesn’t want to put on his diaper, then getting the best baby snuggles on the couch before bed time.… CONTINUE READING

Mom Brain

About six years ago when I was pregnant for the first time, I was talking to a co-worker that was also pregnant. This was her second pregnancy and she already had a toddler at home.

We were discussing mom brain. She told me that it just gets worse after the baby is born because you have to remember literally everything that has ever occurred or could possibly occur in the future and when. Things like how many ounces your newborn drank at what time on which side, when is their next pediatrician appointment, if they are old enough to start eating solid foods, if the cleaning supplies you are using will put them at a disadvantage on college applications and if they are pooping regularly.… CONTINUE READING

Terrible Twos

I always see posts on Facebook that say things like, “They aren’t the terrible twos, your child is just learning.” Or the ones that say if I am more consistent with my parenting, my two-year old won’t be so terrible.

Well, you know what I have to say about that?

Shove it.

Right now, I have a very terrible two-year old and I don’t think that he’s just learning. I think by the smirk on his face that he knows exactly what he is doing and wants to test just how far he can push me before I snap.

Disclaimer: I always have to provide a disclaimer.… CONTINUE READING