Completely Random Thoughts I Have Throughout the Day

As a parent of two tiny minions, I sometimes find my mind wandering in odd directions.

Sometimes, when I should be concentrating on a task, such as filing our taxes or folding laundry, I will start thinking random thoughts. The majority of them are kid related, but a lot of them are not.

I decided to jot down all my random thoughts from a day and share them with you.

Why?

Because I need to know if this is normal.

I need justification that I’m not the only mom who legitimately ponders where their kid should go to preschool and if I should go ahead and place him on a waiting list. He is only one.

So here we go, raw and unfiltered as always:

I think I should get the boys some new shoes for summer even though they will spend the majority of their time barefoot.
How long will it take them to clean the playroom and what will I have to bribe them with?
What theme would Henry like for his 5th birthday party?
What if we invite Henry’s preschool friends to his party and no one comes? He would be so sad and I think I would cry for him. But he seems like he has a lot of friends!
Is the circumference of Simon’s head large enough?
I wonder if Fabletics will exchange my new yoga pants because I pulled them too hard trying to make them “high waisted” and put a hole in the crotch.
I should paint the upstairs bathroom. And re-tile the floor. And maybe install some bead board.
I wonder whatever happened to that black shirt that disappeared in my closet. I really liked it.
I should not have Marie Kondo’ed my summer wardrobe because I have no clothes anymore and that does not bring me joy.
Can I put Henry on a swim team if he doesn’t know how to swim?
I wonder if they serve rectangle pizza at schools still.
How many days until I get to go on vacation?
I wish I got a summer break.
I could seriously use a tan. This light pink shirt looks very flesh colored on me today.
Should I sanitize all the toys in the playroom?
Can I buy new blinds on Amazon?
I’m really tired. More coffee.
When will I have time to do all the laundry this weekend?
Will my kids notice that I ate all their good Easter candy?
I hope the dog’s ear infection is gone.
I’m so tired.
I’m so hungry.
Is this allergies or am I getting pneumonia?
Should I revaccinate my family so we don’t get measles?
How is Grey’s Anatomy still on the air?
Will I ever be able to retire?
How big ARE the fish in the Ohio River?
Should I try contouring?
I need to add more beans to my diet.
Why does Simon like green yogurt so much?
Are the boys drinking enough water? I only see them drink bath water.
I think someone gave me a savings bond for my birthday when I was ten and I wonder what happened to it.
Avocados really don’t taste like anything.
The family budget could use some updating.
Is anyone even going to read this?
Is that an army man sitting on top of that curtain rod?
Why can’t Henry take his pants and underwear off separately?
Why does he leave them laying in one piece on the floor like they flew off while he was running?
Too much Easter candy.
Should I drink coffee and actually do something with my life or continue to lay on the couch and type this on my phone?
The dog needs a bath.
I need to wash this blanket.
I really need to pull all Henry’s paperwork together for kindergarten and drop it off at the school.
How is he getting so big? *Cue misty eyes
Yell “Stop throwing toys at your brother!” from the comfort of the couch.
It’s so odd that the baby is the instigator. He acts so innocent.
Will Aunt Becky go to prison? She should have plead guilty like the woman from Desperate Housewives.
Should I burn all my Mossimo Target wear in protest?
Will I ever get the chance to actually finish watching the first episode of the Bachelorette?
Why can’t my boys keep their hands out of their pants?
I wonder when I can start potty training Simon. We are going to save a fortune when we stop buying diapers.