Social media and I have a love/hate relationship. Since I have been on maternity leave, I have spent a lot of time scrolling through Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest and Instagram to pass the hours while attempting to comfort my newborn that has not taken up sleeping at night yet. While it does keep me extremely entertained, it also makes me feel extremely inadequate at times.
Being a mom in this modern world is hard. Everyone splashes their beautiful family pictures and workout selfies and Pinterest birthday parties all over the internet. I have done these things too!! Henry’s first birthday was a freaking fiesta. I always choose the best picture to post on social media. I workout and I have posted about it on Facebook. Sorry peeps that unfriended me for that but you probably aren’t reading this anyway so that apology was unnecessary.
That’s why I started this blog. Because it’s okay to show the hard side of life and being a parent and admit that you have failures.
It all started around last September. I had been thinking about starting this blog for a few months and just hadn’t done it. Then one night around 6:30 pm I was sitting in my car in the drive-thru at McDonalds. My two year old at the time was screaming “FRENCH FRIES” from his car seat at a volume that could probably be heard from miles around. I had just completed a really long day at work and the sound of his screeching was really getting to me. Since McDonalds lines in my city move very slowly, I was in park and perusing Instagram. One of my friends was at New York Fashion Week. She was sitting at the show of a very well-known designer and posting pictures of the latest fashion trends. I literally laughed out loud after realizing that crying wouldn’t make me feel better. She was at Fashion Week and I was in the drive-thru at a McDonalds in Kentucky with a toddler screaming about fried potatoes in the backseat. That’s when I decided it was time to write about real life.
I saw this meme the other day and it spoke to my soul. I’m sure most of you have seen it.
As a modern parent, we are expected to do the following things:
- Have an extremely successful career while also being a great free range non-helicopter parent
- Throw Pinterest worthy parties with handmade pinatas that look like Minions or Moana
- Attend other Pinterest worthy parties
- Actually remember to bring gifts to those parties
- Keep a clean house
- Pay the bills and keep the family on a balanced budget
- Go on date nights without getting completely slammed and making an ass out of yourself at a local bar
- Have a hobby that is something besides drinking or napping
- Do the laundry and iron things so your family actually has clean clothes
- Attend church in those ironed clothes
- Drink protein shakes and workout 3-5 times a week
- Volunteer
- Garden and join a garden club where you have to attend meetings during your lunch break once a month
- Sign your kids up for at least three extra-curricular activities a year and coach at least one of them or be a team mom
- Hand out juice boxes and orange slices after these activities. RC Cola is no longer an acceptable post-game drink.
- Have strong political opinions
- Replace all cleaning products with non-GMO HPA BTC RGU TMP products that would be safe if your baby drank it. But your baby wouldn’t drink it because your house is completely baby proofed.
- Wear the latest fashion trends and full makeup at all times
- Attend hot yoga without sweating
- Enjoy every moment with your kids and take them to the zoo or some sort of festival every weekend
- Learn to be a minimalist
- Never get sick
- Always be on time
- Be more like Joanna Gaines in every way possible
- Not complain about any of the above
Not to be a total buzzkill, but all my mom did when I was little was make sure my sister and I didn’t die while riding our bikes around Owensboro while she sat in our living room watching General Hospital and talking to her sisters on the phone about the new wallpaper she was hanging in the dining room. Sorry if you are reading this mom. I know you did more than that but that is the main part I remember.
So don’t let social media get you down. Remember that it isn’t real life. It is the highlight reel of everyone else’s lives. NEVER let it make you feel inadequate. Because you are an amazing mom.
Even though your favorite tv show is Bachelor in Paradise and you were really upset when you thought it might actually be cancelled this summer.
Even though your house is not open-concept with a farmhouse sink and ship lap and a handmade kitchen table made by a man named Clint.
Even though you have never tried one craft you pinned on Pinterest.
Even though the last time you attended Pilates class was six years ago and you fell off one of those really big stability balls you are supposed to sit on.
Even though you still clean your house with Windex and Lysol.
And to all the moms that are completing ANY of the items listed above, you are freaking killing it. For real. I wish I could manage it all but I can’t. And that’s okay. Because I’m doing the best I can and I’m pretty proud of myself for it.
Until Next Time,
Jamie
I love your blog so much!! Have our moms met?
Thank you so much!! Did your mom watch a lot of general hospital too???
I love this whilst knowing I have been on both sides of the social media sharing. We just gotta remember that no mom is doing it all. We are all just sharing the little victories when we do get something done!
So true!!
Haha, this was too funny, and so true. It’s natural to want people to want to talk more about your successes than failures, so most people share those things on social media and make their lives look all bright and shiny. No one is that perfect.
Love this post – so much truth! I’m not a mum (yet!), but my close friends are beginning to have babies and it just seems like such a tall order in this day & age, & no matter what & how you prioritise, you can’t please everyone! Rx
That meme speaks to my soul too! I try to take little breaks from Social Media from time to time and it does my soul good.
I can totally relate, lol! I have a 3 month old and I’m already being pressured on issues like his first birthday, my weight, our dressing, his school. It’s just crazy, sometimes I just want to say, “Earth, stop rotating I need to alight! “
I feel you!! Sometimes you just have to sit back and say screw it all. 😂😂😂
I can not tell you how much I can relate! It’s just all too much sometimes. I kind of forget it’s not real because in comparison to what I see online my life is one big mess .lol. Sometimes you just have to unplug for your own sanity.
Unplugging is the best thing to do when you feel that it’s getting to be a bit much. I also have to not answer phone calls from my own mom. Haha.
I’ve had the exact experience, where my friends are working at fashion week or doing a celebrity shoot and here I am on FB, wishing it was me. Glad to know I’m not alone..
This is definitely true! Comparison is the thief of joy for sure. We need more real moms to talk about what modern Motherhood is.
This is SO true. And something I too have felt compelled to talk about. Real life is not what you see on facebook! If so, my family is a hot mess! LOL!
Supposed to spot on. Your echoing the feelings of a lot of people including myself. You’re right about the social media. I noticed the days where I don’t go on it I feel a lot better about my parenting skills and my house.
I know right? I feel like I’m a better mom all around.
It’s like reading my life! lol Thanks for this.
This is a great read. Now granted, I do some of those things, NO ONE is perfect and it’s an illusion. So thanks for bringing to light.
It’s such a tricky thing right? I like social media for so many things but not the pressure that can come along with it for moms!
Love this!! It’s so real and authentic!
Thank you! Someone has to keep it real!!
Oh my goodness. This is SO TRUE. We only see “the best” of people online.
It can really tug at your heart!
Great post.
I have been browsing for a post like this for quite a very long moment.