I always write about what is going on my life, so today I am going to put some stuff out into the world that has been affecting my family.

I have always kept it real on here and I feel like if I don’t put this out there, I’m not being authentic. But in all reality, I I need to hear from another parent that has been in the same situation. And luckily I have platform where I can do that.

I talk constantly about my sweet Cy Baby. He will be one year old on July 20th. He is the happiest, sweetest, most adorable baby I have ever met.

One thing I have not really ever talked about in my blogs is that he has been having developmental issues for some time now. When he was a couple months old, his pediatrician expressed some concern about low muscle tone in his legs.

We put him in a program called First Steps and he has been doing physical therapy for about six months now. Though he has made some progress, he is nowhere near where he needs to be.

At almost one year old, my baby does not crawl and does not pull up on anything.

As a mom, I think I have been in denial. I didn’t want to admit that there might be a problem. I thought he was just behind. That he would do things in his own time. I thought he was lazy and he just didn’t care. I thought maybe it was because I carried him too much. He’s just so cute; I always have him on my hip.

We went to the pediatrician a few days ago and one of my worst fears came true. Simon is being referred to a Pediatric Neurologist.

When the pediatrician told me and my husband that, I think I blacked out. I heard the word neurologist and thought, “Oh my gosh, there is something wrong in my baby boy’s brain.”

I got in my car and cried. All you ever want is a happy, healthy baby. But what if I just get happy, without the healthy? What if my child never walks?

I took the day to wallow. And then I had to start being positive. I can’t fixate on worrying about my sweet boy and an issue he may or may not have in the future. All I can do is love him, work with him, and pray.

We haven’t heard back on when we can get into the specialist yet. The best case scenario is that they do some brain scans and everything is perfect. That my sweet baby really is just lazy.

I don’t want to think about the worst case scenario. Because all a parent wants for her child is to have a happy, carefree life.

So I do ask that if any of you have been in this situation, please let me know. I would love to talk to someone that has been through this. It isn’t easy.

I think it’s the waiting and not knowing that is the worst. Once we see the specialist and everything is figured out, I will feel better knowing there is a plan, whether the outcome is what I’m hoping for or not.

And if you could, keep our sweet Cy Baby in your thoughts and prayers.

Until Next Time,

Jamie

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